Horses ON A PLANE!!!

POW Report is the Number ONE Alaska source for all news on Planes! We pride ourselves on producing the best news regarding air travel because we KNOW that the news is ALWAYS better when it's ON A PLANE!

In a headline that is a year old and somehow managed to slip past our esteemed--and dearest 'umble editor--POW Report LEARNED that Southwest Airlines is formally allowing miniature horses on its planes as service animals.

From September 2017, the airline will only let dogs, cats, and miniature horses in the cabin, according to a statement on its website.

The new policy also includes a list of animals that are not eligible to come on board, which features insects, spiders, rabbits, ferrets, or rodents.

Lol, how arbitrary is the list? So they'll let on horses and cats but not insects? A very large percentage of people are allergic to cats, so why the hell would that be allowed in a passenger seat? Yet a rabbit which are cute and fluffy aren't?

THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!

The rule change comes after increasing reports of people trying to bring unusual animals onto planes as service or emotional support animals. The later category is poorly understood, which has led to confusion about what should be allowed.

In January, United Airlines rejected a woman's effort to bring a peacock on a flight as her emotional support bird. Delta airlines changed its policy in January after what they said was an 84% increase in reported incidents with animals like biting and urinating since 2016.

This is what happens when 95% of people are pussies and don't shame others in public. The scourge of society takes advantage of loop-holes and literally shits all over common decency:

You: "Hey your dog just shit all over the carpet..."

Scourge of society: "Middle Finger"

You: "That's nice"

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why sarcasm is a sin. Clearly it's not "nice" to shit on the carpet. So why would you say that? The man clearly should have just ran over, pulled his pants down and shit on the dog to teach that thot a lesson about not cleaning up! Or at minimum peed on her leg.

Speaking of pee pee poo poo, clearly these animals are shitting all over airports and airplanes and yet, what, people just sit there and pretend it didn't happen? It's ridiculous! I once farted on a plane and this old lady looked at me and shamed me like I was a dog...yet I bet she wouldn't have said a single word if I was a dog and pooped on her by accident. Needless to say, I'VE NEVER EVER FARTED ON A PLANE AGAIN! And everyone knows how difficult it is to hold an airplane fart in, so I basically deserve a purple heart....

While miniature horses will be allowed to travel as service animals, only cats and dogs can be emotional support animals, Southwest said. Emotional support animals do not perform tasks like guiding a person or pushing a wheelchair for their owners and are classed differently from service animals in the US.

There was a movie made in 2006 called Idiocracy and long story short, a man time-travels to the future and realizes that he's the smartest man in the world because everyone else is retarded. In an iconic scene our hero tries to convince the White House staff that plants need water to grow instead of "Brawndo the Thirst Mutilator."

You must watch the scene, the iconic line is "But Brawndo's got what plants crave...it's got electrolytes."

"Emotional support animals" are the "Brawndo" of 2019, "I have to have my emotional support animal because that's what I crave... it's got emotional support."

I don't trust people who have emotional support animals---they are literally the worst human beings on the planet. Literally, they are worse than Stalin or Mao Zedong. Never, Ever, Never, Ever trust someone who caries an emotional support animal. Unless it's a Honey Badger...those are approved: